Today was day one of infomercial-fitness-product Boot Camp. I’m participating in the test group for the new round of testimonials. I’m also the editor of the show. I hope to lose some pounds, make some friends, and blog a little bit about it.

First off, let me say, I’m not in shape. I was probably in better shape two years ago, or maybe a year ago, but I’ve never been in great shape. I enjoy activities and doing things outside, but I don’t really consider myself an athlete. I love rock climbing and I love hiking, but I don’t do either of those things often enough to make it into an athletic event.

When things happen simultaneously in my life, I like to draw parallels. Today is the first day of the ass kicking work out and it’s also first day that I’m legally allowed to drive where ever I want.

At the beginning of 2010, I was in a somewhat minor accident (read: my car is still a little wonky, two years later). Unfortunately, I was uninsured at the time. I know, it was a bonehead move, but it is what happened. After lots of talk and hope that it would work out well, it didn’t. Progressive wanted me to pay them a large sum of money because they decided the accident was 50/50 fault. Meaning it was no one person’s fault, but we were each responsible for half of the fixing of the other dude’s car. His car repair, which I’m sure had a lot of cosmetic markup, was about $14,000. Now, I can’t say that it was all frivolous repairs, but it does seem like it goes against the honor that I was brought up to have about these sorts of events.

I figured there would be ramification for this lack of payment on my part. But, it turns out, I have two things in my favor: patience and poverty (and possibly the truth). What happened is White Toyota made a left turn in front of Black Jetta into an intersection. I was driving along my merry way, when, BAM White Toyota Truck turns in front of me. (That’s the truth as I remember it.)

The reason that I didn’t have insurance at the time was because I couldn’t afford it. Don’t cry for me Argentina. It was a shitty time and I was broke. The bill came, it left. They notified me that they were going to cancel, and they did. I didn’t have the cashola to pay them. That poverty worked in my favor as they started calling and hounding me to pay my portion of the bill, that I didn’t see was my fault, and I didn’t have the money to pay.

Last, and certainly not least, I’m patient. I say this with now illusions that I have my very impatient moments, but for the long and short of the haul, I’m patient. This worked in my favor when I received a letter from the CA DMV telling me that that my license was going to be suspended. I thought, 30, maybe 60 days tops. I can handle that. BAM. ONE YEAR. That’s right ladies and germs, my license was suspended for one year. This did try my patience, but it did also secure the payment, that I feel that I owe. By paying these days, 365 of them, I paid for what I did wrong to left turn toyota — I was uninsured.

Today is day one for two things. It’s day one for the workout. It’s also day one for car freedom. I was able to drive to work and home again. Occasionally, I would stretch that, and take my laptop to certain events — working away from home. But, I did as best I could, to uphold the letter of the law, and pay my dues. I am currently insured and see no reason why I would need to let that lapse in the near future.

I took last thursday and friday off, some of my first paid vacation days, ever. I got on an aeroplane flew across the meadowlands and touched down in Sioux Falls, just after 1pm. Traveling during the day is nice. I dig the idea of getting there with some daytime left. Dane and I went to Nick’s Gyros on the strip that is modern Sioux Falls. I’ve driven by many times, but never stopped. I was very impressed. It was much better than I expected — that’s not to say that you shouldn’t expect good authentic Greek or Mediterranean food in the midwest — it is rather surprising when you find it.

I first laid eyes on Ross thursday night. They planned a get together for those who had gathered. It was supposed to be a bon fire, but rain prevented their plans. The Fruited Plain was a welcomed venue change. It was easier for me, but it did wrinkle a plan. It was a great to see so many happy faces; faces that I haven’t seen for many years. Some, five years since I laid eyes. It was great to see Ross and Lisa surrounded by so many people that had gathered to support and to celebrate with them.

Friday consisted of a good amount of family time as well as some time alone during the day. I was able to re-watch Little Miss Sunshine on Comedy Central. That movie is fantastic. I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed watching it again. I laughed, I cried and I cringed. Knowing how the movie ends up, the finale, makes the build up so much more entertaining. I loved it.

Saturday, Mom and Dad spent a lot of time preparing for their International Supper. I designed a logo of sorts for Mom’s new business endeavor. It was fun to be at home around the hustle and bustle of a Maatman Weekend. Come early afternoon, Dane and I departed for farms north — A wedding was to be had. We found it okay. Slightly later than dutch boy Dane wanted, but all was well. Another familiar face popped up: Marcus. Marcus was officiating the wedding. What a great thing. Friends grow up, get big fancy degrees, lay brick, open shops, teach small children, and pastor churches. It was great to see boyhood friends, Ross and Marcus, sharing such a memorable event.

The wedding was beautiful.

The reception was a blast.

Sunday was far too rushed, Church, Drive, Late, Plane, Not-nearly-as-late-as-I-Thought, arrive home.

Back in LA. An uneventful trip and I worked two full days already this week. Amazing that a metal box can carry me back to such good people and back again in a few days.

My top five albums:

• Funeral – Arcade Fire
• In An Aeroplane over the Sea – Neutral Milk Hotel
• North Hills – Dawes
• Kid A – Radiohead
• Revolver – The Beatles

My top five songs, in the past 10 years:

• England – The National
• Rebellion – Arcade Fire
• Ballad of Love and Hate – The Avett Brothers (best live)
• Keep Yourself Warm – Frightened Rabbit
• See How Far We’ve Come – Dawes

These things change, but today, in this moment, this is what it is.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to do and who I want to do it with for the rest of my working life.

Not so much where.

This isn’t a crisis as much as it is a reevaluation.

French press coffee is very good.

Attended my first Opera yesterday.

Movies from your childhood, my childhood, are weird as an adult. Kids look young when they should look old.

When did I become discerning about movies?

Cookies. Cookies. Good.

Using spacebar instead of setting up tab markers.

Discern – Fragged!

Who knew Dunkin’ Doughnuts made such good coffee?

In which I explain why I suck.

Ted suggested I do a kinetic text animation for the string of phrases. He’s right. I should.

Now. To find the motivation to make that happen. Please. Thank you.

I discovered Sports Night on Netflix. I am enjoying Aaron Sorkin’s first TV effort. It makes so much sense. The West Wing and Studio 60 are two of my favorite serial TV shows and Sports Night fits the mold well, but it’s rough and it’s tumble. For one, it’s a 22 min sitcom style length, but it’s a single camera and not often laugh out loud funny. It’s usually feels too short, yet poignant. The dialog is repetitive, Really? Really. Really? Really. But it has a real life quick wit about it that became too quick and too witty in the West Wing. It has loads of people that you’d recognize, William H. Macy, Peter Krause, Felicity Huffman, etc. etc. etc.

Here is the thing. All this TV. This Tele-Vision, is beamed directly into my house. DIRECTLY. This isn’t new, but it’s all on demand, that is kinda new. However you look at it; at my finger tips is, MacGuyver, The Cosby Show, That 70’s Show, Sports Night, Studio 60, or Battlestar Galactica. To name several. At any moment I can, like, you know, watch an entire season of Sports Night. Or I can work on my short film. Yea, I could do that…

or MacGuyver! Childhood revisited: Sliders. Babylon 5. Star Trek. Too Much TV Makes Jack Not Be Productive.

So. What do we do? What do I do? I don’t know. After spending a long day at work, it’s really hard to sit in front of yet-another-computer and work on my short. Or Kinetic Text. Or Sonny. Or This-Yet-To-Be written movie, I’m writing. Or. Or. Or.

If Ifs and Buts were candy and nuts…How does that saying go? I need some gall darn moderation. I need a bit of structure. I need to lut down some pimits. I’m asking for input. How do you get the stuff done that you want to get done? I’d much rather sit on the couch and let the tide of Netflix roll over me. In the terms of Merlin, How do you ship something new when you have a day job?

I’ve been playing this game with Nikki. Connecting words or phrases to make a big long string of non-sensical fun.

Here is our latest creation:

birthday cake walk in the park taverns maid rite loose meat on a casey’s bakery bun coffee maker sit down and shut up and away in my beautiful beautiful baloony binge eating healthy start up and about a boy george harrison ford escape artist’s quarter year long beautiful hair style magazine rack of lamb chop suey-thing massage parlord of war of the world vision correction-ing your relatives-itting from iowa hawkeyes have it’s about time to go ahead make my daytime soapy water glass house guest bath towel off and on top of the world traveler-ning disability pay rating slump-ed over and under the bed of iniquities-zing me after school yard brawl my eyes out and about the town drunk love of my lifetime movie at the parking ramp uptown house mother of pearl earring around your finger-l Friday of the dead space cadet in training ground for life of crime and punishmentally challenged individual at dawned on me-an girlsurly brewing company car jack maatman on wireless Internet income over to my place for you can count on meager lodging-gle bells batman smelled something rotten dollar billionaire plane crash wednesday time talk show me the money isn’t everything of the past and present me a letter-sheairy thoughts.

Reading it aloud is a chore and I find it extremely entertaining. I did another one of these with Matt and Tyler after the film shoot, and I attempted to typeset it, but wasn’t too successful.

(click to enlarge)

I got somewhere, but didn’t like it when I arrived. I tried again with the latest one, but gave up. It’s really hard to communicate the humor in it, using only text. Anyone want to take a crack at typesetting this in a readable fun-ny way?

My favorite band is releasing a new album on June 7. I pre-ordered it this morning. As a reward they gave me an EP.

They’re also doing some videos leading up to the release.

One of the songs on the EP, Time Spend In Los Angeles (youtube), resonates with this fella; it’s an unmistakable thing.

For Ethan, Joel, and Lauren:

In which he documents the laughter of last night.

I laughed a lot last night. Most of it was Ethan’s fault. We started doing this potential joke bit. If someone was clever, we’d dissect it, suggesting what the joke could have been about, like, “That was a potential homonym joke.” The best part was we didn’t explain the new potential joke, but we knew. You had to be there. Ethan wants to be a stand up comic that starts all of his jokes with, you had to be there.

This is all very likely less funny than it was in person. I don’t mind though. It reaffirms that all y’all need to visit. Soon.

Three hipsters walk into a bar.

Admiral Akbar

“Can you be more specific.”

Tri-Bond